The status of women... watch out, I'm an activist! But some of my views have changed now that I've been immersed in a completely different culture, and I can see that some traditions make sense. I think I may be a bit utopian here, but it was to show that there are two sides to every story (except FGM).

Status of women

I want to share some thoughts you may find interesting regarding how women are treated in rural and modern Kenya.

First of all, lobola, or bride price, is primarily recognition of a woman’s inherent value. It does seem dangerously close to paying for a woman, but in fact it’s similar to what Trent O’Brien mentions – that it cements the relationship between the two families. In fact, in some tribes, the payment is like a mortgage – it may take 20 years to pay off! And the wife is not officially in the husband’s family until such time that it’s fully paid.

If a woman’s family asks a low price, then the potential husband’s family may question her suitability – i.e. is there something wrong with her? A wife is valuable first and foremost because she will provide children, who are considered an investment in the future – they will take care of the parents in their old age, so children are almost like an RRSP. That, along with high infant mortality rates, also accounts for the otherwise inexplicable fact that Africans living in poverty continue to have so many children.

The other value of a woman is her domestic duty – like William Murphy states in his post, the woman contributes economically to the family while the husband fulfills his military, hunting, and political functions. Today, this has been replaced by the man moving to a town for paid employment. The wife is left home with the children and manages all aspects of the daily life, while the man visits every few months and provides cash.

In regard to polygamy, it is true that only rich men can afford many wives – and corresponding with this, more wives make a man richer. The first wife usually welcomes a second, as they will be able to share the workload of caring for children, fetching wood and water, farming, etc. In attempting to understand this from our western viewpoint, remember that marriage is more based on business than love, and children provide for their parents, so more is better. When seen from this perspective, lobola and polygamy make much more sense.

I will also say that if a man marries a wife without paying lobola, she is liable to be treated poorly – since her worth is obviously zero. I’m in that situation myself – in fact, my Kenyan husband will buy land in Kenya for my father (since it would be rather difficult to send cattle to Canada!). Even though my tradition obviously does not include bride price, my husband (though otherwise modern in outlook) would just not feel right if he did not compensate my father for the loss of his daughter. [Not sure if this has been settled yet but it will be soon!!]

In these examples, you can see that although we consider their mechanisms sexist, women are actually prestigious in African (at least Kenyan) society. However, there can also be outcomes of the opposite nature.

For instance, some tribes do consider the wife to be the husband’s property, as well as the children. I know of many examples where a child is born outside of marriage and then given to the man’s family unconditionally. Because the wife is also sometimes considered property, this can manifest certain unacceptable behaviours – much like in the west, Kenya also has a problem of domestic violence directed toward the wife. Though the behaviour is the same as the west, the husband’s explanation will be different based on his conception that his wife is his property. There is even a public debate occurring right now, when male members of parliament are arguing against a federation of woman lawyers (FIDA) who advocate for women’s rights. Their accusations against FIDA range from breaking up families, to trying to pull prominent men down, to questioning the lawyers’ basic credentials if they are not married, to not encouraging reconciliation between beater and beaten. It’s simple incredible that these views are held in the society’s leaders, but I am thankful it’s a hot topic currently being discussed through every medium.

Furthermore, some tribes go to extreme measures to protect their daughters’ chastity, including FGM (female genital mutilation). This is not often a simple snip, but a complete removal of external genitalia and subsequent stitching together. Effectively, the girl cannot have sex until she is operated on a second time. Obviously the health and psychological effects of this practice can be devastating.

Another effect of the importance placed on child-bearing is the stigma attached to being barren. In some tribes, if a couple is not successful in producing children, their families and elders will discreetly try to determine who is the problem – the man or the woman. The elders may then select a relative of the husband to attempt to impregnate her. If successful, the child(ren) are raised as the husband’s without question. If unsuccessful, the woman will likely be divorced – if not ostracized, stigmatized, and worse. Woman who cannot bear children are considered useless and this also has damaging effects on the female psyche.

Finally, there is the issue of wife inheritance, which provides at that the death of her husband, she will automatically become the wife of her husband’s brother. Obviously, in a country where so many have died from AIDS, this becomes a hot issue for preventing the spread of the disease, not to mention the wife being treated as mere chattel.

Fortunately, as mentioned, lots of public discussion is being conducted to separate cultural directives from basic human rights, and I do believe that Kenyans will overcome their hold on unproductive cultural practices.

Johanna

Copyright Johanna Voerman Khisa, 2002-03. Reprinting or reposting without permission is prohibited.